Author Archives: Tlell Elviss

Goodbye Nepal

It is the morning of our departure from Nepal. The last two weeks have been filled with many goodbyes. It has not been the slow and reflective farewell that I hoped for but rather an event of endurance as we race from one thing to the next. It was a goodbye that lasted almost 2 weeks and has left us exhausted but very grateful.

There are still many things we did not see and places we did not visit. But instead we have collected a wonderful group of friends who we have promised to visit again in the future. I feel happy that we invested time in relationships rather than tourist attractions. The people will be very much missed but have captured a very large part of our hearts.

So, as we bid farewell to Nepal to spend the next 6 months travelling, I feel ready. Ready for adventure, ready for a new beginning, and ready for the flood of emotions and memories that will live with me as I remember Nepal.

And while I will continue my reflections here over the next 6 months of travel I would also like to bid a very fond farewell to my Honouring Fridays posts. For a year of Fridays I took the time to reflect on things I was grateful for and it helped me transition in my new culture and share what I was seeing with people I was far away from. I have learned that a life inspired is truly a life lived with gratitude.

With lots of love,

Tlell

Honouring Fridays: January 1st, 2010

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Welcome to a New Year! Last night was my farewell party with my organization. I spent the evening surrounded by many of the people who have filled my working time in Nepal and felt so honoured and celebrated. The evening reminded me that so much of our work here is built on relationships. That the people I worked with expected the relationship to be built first, before much of the work could be started. They will be the first to acknowledge that I challenged them, sometimes more than was comfortable, but that the outcomes of our work were plentiful this past year. And I was the first to admit that I came with high expectations, short patience for inefficiencies, and perhaps an overly direct communication style (which at home is not direct at all but here translates into being quite direct and pushy!). The fact that so many people appeared for the celebration and so much care was taken to celebrate our achievements tells me that the relationships were successful. So, what looks on paper like an impressive list of achievements is actually much, much more significant – the capacities of people to interact and share in a genuine way and to build relationships – that is the real work and real outcome.

Our Chairperson, Mr. Baburam, thanking me. The white scarves, khata, were given by the many members in attendance to honour me and the marigold garland, malla, is also a form of honour. I was really touched and very happy :) — Our Chairperson, Mr. Baburam, thanking me. The white scarves, khata, were given by the many members in attendance to honour me and the marigold garland, malla, is also a form of honour. I was really touched and very happy 🙂

Opportunity. Like many of you, the 1st day of a New Year naturally brings some moments of pause and reflection. And what I fell most grateful for today is that the past year has given me so many new opportunities. Many of those opportunities were incredibly uncomfortable – bathing at a public tap while wrapped loosely in a long strip of fabric, trying to achieve some basic skill in a language that was so unfamiliar, and tackling work projects that were outside both my areas of expertise and my fields of interest. But what was common to all of them was that they were all uncomfortable learning opportunities. The greatest opportunity we can be given is the chance to step outside our comfort zones and this past year I have done that more than any other time in my life.
The Soloist. A beautiful and moving film. Reminds me of the idealism with which we approach human suffering, hoping to make change but perhaps becoming too focussed on a final “solution” or “outcome” while ignoring the wants and needs of the individual. In many ways this has been a struggle for me in Nepal as well – wanting so much to help people but needing to keep my own desires for their life in check so that they can fulfill their own dreams, not mine. This movie was a wonderful look into relationships, the role of “giver” and “receiver”. The real motivation to help people is often rooted in authenticity and genuine care but can quickly become overshadowed by a belief that the right solution is only possible through
Gifts of talent. I was so privileged to be the recipient of some lovely gifts last night. Beautiful wood carvings that will take some creative thinking to get home, a lovely letter of appreciation, and a red sari for special celebrations at home. But perhaps the most thoughtful of all was the gift from the didi who cleans our office. Now that the weather has turned cold I have been wearing a cap to work. We have been chatting about how cold it has been (about 5-10 degrees inside) so on my last day in the office she arrives with a cap she has knit for me! The colours are based on the scarf I wear every day and the style looks remarkably like the cap I have been wearing. Such a thoughtful gift and such a kind gesture. Truly a gift of talent that will both remind me of her generosity and keep me cozy and warm.

Sari — If Nepal has taught me one thing it is to not be afraid of wearing colours and patterns! My new sari and the knit cap from our didi. The sweater, while rather unflattering, was necessary because of the cold but I can assure you that the sari looks MUCH better without it.

The year ahead. There is so much anticipation about the year ahead, partiularly as our world will shift significantly in 2 weeks. We uproot ourselves once more and begin a 6 month set of travels. It is a thrilling prospect and I have such gratitude that so much will occur in the next year. I eagerly await the opportunity to connect with friends and family again in various parts of the world. It is time to begin anew and that fresh start is what I am most grateful for today.

Another shot of the cap up close as I sit outside and enjoy my salted ginger tea, a Newari specialty.

Honouring Monday (because Friday got the best of me): December 28th, 2009

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Merry Belated Christmas! This is a late blog post in lieu of one that was half finished for last Friday, Christmas Day, when I just simply ran out of steam for writing. It was a combination of packing for our big move on Boxing Day and the preparations for a pseudo-Christmas dinner that ran into some problems (the biggest being that the chicken we bought was rotten, but we didn’t realize it until it was half cooked which then sent R on a run to the local Tandoori shop that I actually think was way tastier anyway) that has resulted in a Monday post instead if a Friday one (as if you even noticed anyway!). We have finally settled into our new house and, despite the fact that it is about 10 degrees colder than our previous top floor apartment, we are enjoying it. The lovely dog, Kiva, makes it feel a lot like an actual home (as does the real couch and chairs, dining room table, and luxurious bed with a feather duvet!). So, it is a nice way to transition out of Nepal – a little bit of luxury – before we find ourselves homeless vagabonds for 6 more months.

Warmth. There is nothing we take more for granted at home then clean water and warmth. While we have found ways to secure clean water here it is the quest for true warmth still eludes us slightly. First, and this takes some time before it clicks in, is that it is always warmer outside. The concrete buildings and lack of a heating system combine to make indoors frigid while the outdoors are sun basking and lovely. Inside we often wear toques, fleece jackets and double layers of wool socks inside slippers. And if computing anything some sort of gloves or arm warmers are a must for the chilly exposed arm and finger skin. Top all that off with a blanket for any moment when we are sitting still and a cup of tea is always on the ready. The closest comparison I can make is that it is a bit like camping in December, but only when inside. And there is always a slight feeling of chill despite the layers most often caused by any bare skin that comes in contact with the air or by any shifting one makes while in their warm cocoon that means a new spot needs to be warmed. All I can do is dream of Hawaii and the Philippines and know that in 19 days I will feel warm again.
Inverters (aka uninterruptible power supplies). The loadshedding schedule is set to increase to about 6 hours per day (3 hours in the morning and 3 hours in the evening). And usually, we adapt by lighting candles, reading for a short while, and then going to bed exceptionally early. But our new house has an inverter – a battery that stores electricty from solar panels on the roof which can then power a CFL bulb in each room, the TV, and a laptop. And let me tell you, it certainly doesn’t take long to become accustomed to this – I have all but forgotten about candles and early to bed evenings in the span of 2 days! I will look forward to the days when we don’t need to worry about whether we have power in order to shower, check email, or cook dinner. But until then, we will revel in the joys of our temporary inverter.
Being spoiled. So, we maybe wouldn’t choose to live this way, but given that it is part of the housesitting gig, we are left to just sit back and enjoy it 🙂 Despite the fact that we are meant to look after the dog and house the following arrangements were made by the folks who live here and will continue while we stay: 1) A regular cleaning lady who comes 2 days a week to do laundry, dishes, and general cleaning; 2) A gardener who looks after the property, yard and plants; 3) A dog-walker who walks the dog on weekends, 4) A dog mover who takes the dog to doggie daycare Monday-Friday, and finally 5) Doggie daycare who look after the dog on weekdays from 9-5ish. So, what are we left to do? Basically, sit back and enjoy it because this will likely be the only time in my life when I have these perks!
Broccoli. The proliferation of broccoli this season is suprising. However, when one considers where it is being sold, it actually graphs in direct relationship to the density of foreigners. It is not a vegetable that Nepalis eat but is being grown for the foreign palate. So, shops in areas where we live are selling the leafy green bundles. It is an nice change from the cauliflower which is a staple in our diet and provides some added colour and nutrients to a regular meal of rice and curried paneer. I have also taken to chopping the bunches up into giant spears (trees instead of the small shrubs) and tossing it with a oil/dijon/soy/honey/vinegar/red onion dressing before a quick toaster oven roast, which makes the spears all toasted and caramely. Can you say delicious? Unfortunately, I can’t because my mouth is full of broccoli 🙂

Honouring Fridays: December 18th, 2009

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It’s official. I am starting to feel nostalgic about leaving. I am seeing through rose coloured glasses again and remembering all the things that I love about living here. I know that I will come back again but it won’t be the same – I will be a visitor in a city that I once called home. And it is incredible how all the things that can be draining and frustrating about a place – the traffic madness, the inefficiency, the constant tea drinking – suddenly become endearing. I had a moment this week standing on the roof of our house looking out over the city and thinking how wonderful Nepal really is which I think means Nepal has officially gotten under my skin. So, while I am ready to move on, these last few weeks will be difficult. It will be a feast for the senses as I try desperately to remember the sights, smells, sounds, tastes, and feelings of this place. And, apparently, this week’s gratitude is brought to you by the letter “P” (unPlanned but precisely perfect pre-departure pondering).

Pomegranates. The season of really really good pomegranates has FINALLY arrived. They are bigger than a softball and full of hundreds of tartly sweet and juicy little seeds. Here they are available in regular red colour but also in the interesting yellow colour too! They both taste the same but the yellow ones are admittedly easier to eat as the juice doesn’t stain everything it lands on. I plan to enjoy a few pomegranates over the upcoming weeks. First, the seeds over yogurt that is full of dried fruit and nuts, topped with some toasted oats…like a granola but deconstructed. Second, in a couscous of some form. Yay for pomegranates!
Packing. On December 26th, we will carefully pack up our belongings and close the door on our cozy little apartment. Two weeks will be spent house-sitting for a friend and for the final week we will hunker down in the same guest house where we stayed when we first arrived 14 months ago. So, the house has been turned upside down as we sort through things and decide what to pack. I have always enjoyed packing – the trimming of “stuff”, the shrinking of possessions into discrete and neat boxes, the downsizing of life. This time, we are packing to fit into 2 bags, plus one carry-on bag, each. Basically, a life that we can carry on our backs (or send home with gracious friends and family from our first two stops in Hawaii and the Philippines). I look forward to the seeing a life that is bundled into a few bags – that sense of freedom that comes when one is no longer tied down by a home and furniture. That feeling will wear off, eventually, but for now, I am grateful for all the packing.
Poinsettias. Like the red saris worn during weddings by many Nepali women, to me the red poinsettia is a symbol of Nepal. They grow as large as trees here and adorn just about every house in Kathmandu. In most months of the year they are simply green shrubs but when the weather changes and the cold sinks into the Valley the poinsettias pop with colour. Below is a picture of a lovely bush I photographed at Godavari Village Resort during a workshop a couple weeks ago. Hard to believe that these tree-like plants are, back home, only table ornaments for a few weeks in December.

Principles. I know I have always had principles, in some form or another. But it has become clearer to me lately that my principles have become clearer since being in Nepal. There are some interesting conversations going around my office these days about money – how to save it and how to spend it. We have made a set of agreements with our donor on both of these issues. To my colleagues this is seen as a flexible agreement – something that can be bent, twisted, or perhaps even sneakily avoided. I disagree. Strongly. And with conviction. I understand the desire to try and save money for the future (particularly when the future is out of your control and in the hands of those donors). However, I don’t think it is wise (or even legal!) to try and squirrel away unspent funds by faking bills and twisting the truth. So, my principles, have me wading out into unfamiliar territory – not so much defending them as needing to convince others that they are valid. But I guess the gratitude comes when I realize that without my principles I would have little to keep me afloat in the argument. In the end they will do as they wish and I will still have my principles.

The month that democracy forgot

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The month of December is shaping up to be a hectic month for bhandas. The political situation is tense with a recent outbreak of small violence in some of the far western regions of Nepal. Accusations are flying about who is responsible for the death of a group of landless individuals who were killed over a land claim dispute.

The Maoists are accused of recruiting the landless individuals to attack a local police force and the ruling government coalition of parties is accused of using unnecessary force against a marginalised group. The result: petrol strikes, protests, sit-ins at government offices, school closures, and large national wide chakka jams which essentially close down any vehicular movement all over the country. This month alone 4 different groups have issued calls for bhandas which totals about 15 days this month – some will be less effective and will hardly be noticeable while others will be highly effective and close down everything.

I respect that a foundation of democracy is the right to free speech, which often includes protests as a method for communicating. And many rights holders, who have been denyed so much over the history of Nepal, need to utilize their voices, feet, and political power to assert their rights. However, what is being forgotten in the cacaphony of important voices is that with rights comes responsibility. Nobody here ever talks about responsibilities. It would seem that everyone has a whole slew of rights owed to everyone while nobody has any responsibility in seeing that these rights are upheld.

And as such, nobody will take responsibility for the killing of the landless individuals. Each group has clear demands about whose rights have been violated but finger pointing in silence fills the air when questions of responsibility are raised. But this isn’t really new(s) as the ongoing strife between political parties has been continuing for the whole year we have been here. It remains to be seen whether we will come out of December unscathed or a shattered mess of harsh words, good intentions, broken promises, and several paces behind where we started.

So, in the upcoming month of bandhas I send out into the ether a small reminder. That along with rights come responsibilities – what you take as a right from the State then becomes a responsibility in return. “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction”. Thus, in my opinion, every right has an equal and opposite responsibility. Democracy is not democracy without responsibility. And a bandha is not an exercise of rights unless it is accompanied by an equal responsibility to find solutions and move forward.

Honouring Fridays: December 11th, 2009

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I am the least patient person in the world…or at least in this room at the moment. I hate waiting and I catch myself, in moments where my patience has worn thin from waiting, trying to come up with good reasons why waiting is worth it. Because good things can come from waiting. Waiting for love…that is worth it. Waiting for vegetables to germinate and grow…also worth it. Waiting for bread to rise…definitely worth it. Waiting for a summer vacation…still worth it even though I am not 12 and summer vacation does NOT feel like it lasts forever. Waiting for the moment when you have enough money to buy a really wonderful piece of art…pretty sure that will be worth every penny when I get there. My point is that most waiting, while painful and irritating, is often really, really satisfying. So how can I tell if the wait is worth it? I just imagine the outcome. And if I were to arrive at the end of the waiting and find that the outcome is the opposite to what I was hoping for (i.e. no love, no vegetables, no bread, no vacation that lasts forever, and no fancy pants art hanging in my living room) and I know that I would feel sad, disappointed, and heart broken, then it is worth the wait. The investment of time…the waiting…can yield a darn good harvest sometimes…even if I do grumble about it along the way.

The return of orange season. If there is one thing I remember about when I arrived 13 months ago, it was the oranges. The piles upon piles and baskets upon baskets of fragrant oranges on every street corner. It was the first Nepali word I learned. Suntala. Similar to a mandarin oranges but full of seeds they provide a cheap and healthy snack at any time of day. Best eaten outside on a rooftop where seeds are easily spit over the edge. And, locally available which means Mandarin oranges for Christmas are not a once-a-year indulgence here. Instead they are a 4 month staple.
Hot water. The bright orange flame pops to life following a slow hiss as the gas is released. It sputters and flashes. The water dribbles out of the hand-held shower nozzle and into the blue bucket. A few degrees colder and it could be ice. Slowly, the orange flame works its magic on the frigid water, easing the chill. The digital numbers on the front of the gas heater climb slowly. 21. 22. 23. 26. When it reaches 30 I take the plunge. But there is no way it is actually 30. It is probably closer to 25…but warmer than melted ice. It takes about 5 minutes for the water to get hot – steamy hot. But then come the moments in between – when the water is off and the race to lather as quickly as possible is on. The steamy hot is all that separates you from goose bumps. It is an internal debate that I have with myself every time I shower – let the water trickle and keep me warm or turn it off and move fast, very fast. And saving water always wins – no matter how cold those 2 minutes might be – because it means there will still be water left in a couple of days which means the possibility for another blissfully hot shower.
Kathmandu at night. Now that the seasons have changed again, my evening bus rides home at about 5:00 every evening are in the dark. And lately I have found that there is something bewitching about the city in the dark. It retains it frenetic pace and chaotic snarl of traffic, people, and noise but it twinkles. The flashing red of the motocycle lights mixed with the dull sheen of candles in windows where the power is out. The darkness also hides some of the city’s flaws, concealing the gritty, dusty, and worn surroundings and replaces them with mysterious shapes, sleek and modern looking in the darkness. Hurtling across the city on a crowded bus watching Kathmandu slink and wink past my window is one of the best endings to a day.
The moment on weekends when you wake up at 6:00am and realize that you can simply close your eyes and go back to sleep…indefinitely. Roll over, snuggle down, and tumble back into a good dream, a moment of peace, or a deep slumber.

Honouring Fridays: December 4th, 2009

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I am beginning to disconnect – with just over 1 month left in Nepal I am sensing an urgent need to be unimportant in the cogs of everyday work. I actually think this has helped to illuminate a couple of key flaws in how I have worked here – I have made myself too central and did not do enough to develop skills in others. I was focused too much on the goal rather than the process. And despite all the advice I was given at the beginning about seeing the process as THE work we should invest in, I made the cardinal and perhaps rookie mistake of doing too much. I now need to spend my final month transferring, as best I can, everything I have learned, to make sure that knowledge stays here in Nepal and doesn’t hop the plane back to Canada with me. So, in addition to my weekly pauses of gratitude below, I am also grateful that this last month will be slower, easier, and more focused than my previous 13 months…the wisdom of experience has settled in to see me off in good form 🙂

The last pages in my day planner. Each page that I flip in the final month of my day planner represents the end of the year – and it was quite the year! I was flipping back through my planner and marveling at the breadcrumbs I left alluding to what I have spent my time doing over the past year. The notes, scribbles, doodles, underlines, and motley assortment of work related meetings…it is like a ticket stub to a concert…and as the band takes the stage for the final encore number the crowd begins to sway and chant the lyrics to the ballad that made them famous in the first place. December will be my encore…the blog will continue but the album will be different.
Gingerbread. Thank you Epicurious! I have never loved gingerbread cookies all that much, likely due to the dry and crumbly texture, the gobs of white crusty icing, and fake gingery taste that hangs in my mouth. The majority of gingerbread cookies I have eaten have been store-bought which perhaps explains the poor quality and lack lustre feeling they leave me with. But, as I continue to mark my weeks with small Christmas traditions from home, I decided to tackle gingerbread cookies. This recipe is excellent! Rather than cut them out I opted for small, flattened rounds, rolled in sugar, and baked to a golden brown. They ended up a bit more like a soft, chewy gingersnap which has absolutely cured my distaste for dry and crumbly gingerbread. If you haven’t started your Christmas baking I highly recommend this recipe.
Getting crafty. It was Thursday night and I was in desperate need of some wrapping paper. I didn’t have the patience or energy to head out and scrounge for some in the local shops. So instead, I scrounged the house. Paper bag. Check. Paper bag with handles that unravel into raffia like ribbon. Check. Cabbage stem. Check. Cauliflower stem check. Laundry blue that keeps my whites looking white. Check. Sharp knife. Check. I was ready to go. The paper bag transformed into the canvas and with some careful slicing the vegetable stems turned into a star and christmas tree stamp (why waste a good potato for a stamp when the stems of my Brassicaceae will do just fine!). The laundry blue was a great substitute for paint and turned a lovely and shimmery purple on the brown paper. A quick chop, dip, stamp and the paper was done. Gift was wrapped and tied up with a lovely paper bag raffia ribbon! The lesson folks – make it work with whatever junk you’ve got – it is way more fun that way 🙂
My new sari! I posted a photo on facebook earlier this week but thought I would share a different one here. In addition to the tradition kurtaa surwal that many women in Nepal wear, the fancier or perhaps more modern option is the sari. And I felt that I probably shouldn’t leave Nepal without buying one. After stewing over colours and decorations (the bright, sparkly, beaded, embroidered, and heavily encrusted ones just didn’t do it for me) I settled on a turquoise number with dark blue and gold border. After struggling alone while watching this video online I gave up and tossed the sari into a bag – this was going to require some assistance from a regular sari wearer! So, while away for an overnight workshop last weekend my friend Sujata helped. It took me at least 8 attempts to wrap myself without Sujata’s help, but I think I have finally got the basics of it – I won’t dare say I have mastered it…it will likely take another 8 attempts the next time I wear it. It is surprisingly comfortable, feels a bit fancy, and except for the stomach baring portion (dear colleagues, I apologize that you all had to see my stomach during our meeting, but I can tell that it probably bothered me more than it bothered you…actually I think most of you didn’t even notice…pheww!), it is actually quite discrete.

Honouring Fridays: November 27th, 2009

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The week is almost through and the relief and excitement about some serious relaxing and downtime is starting to creep into the mind. It was an 8 day work week with events, interviews, and meetings to fill the time. Somehow, the pace has reminded me of what work life must be like back home and I find I am more efficient and more satisfied with the increase in pace. Does this mean I am better suited to a faster work environment? Or have I not fully adjusted to the slower pace of life here? It might be a shock to arrive home and discover how quickly life will move but somehow I think it will suit me just fine 🙂

Peppermint. It might be the impending Christmas season that has driven this obsession with peppermint but I just can’t seem to get enough of the peppermint tingle. I have a peppermint chapstick, soap, lotion, and now drink a steaming cup of peppermint tea every night. I have dreams of brewing hot chocolate and then steeping a peppermint teabag in the sweet mixture – who needs a Starbucks’ peppermint mocha when you can have that instead!
Letting someone else take control. It is far too easy for me fall into the routine of trying to control and plan everything…I am an organizer…a list maker. I claim those titles proudly, usually, but every once in awhile (and forgive me those of you who are free spirits who would not think for a moment that any of this was truly giving up control…indulge me while I stretch my own boundaries and next time you attempt to make plans I will not scoff in your direction) I enjoy the thrill of letting someone else into my kitchen :). So, this week…I let R make dinner! We had buffalo-mushroom-tomato pasta and it was delicious! I relinquished control in the kitchen and now I am having visions of simply never going back in – that’s how tasty it was!
Being invited into “real life” in Nepal. My colleague Sujata’s son, Ayush, celebrated his 2nd birthday this week. And to my surprise she invited R and I over for dinner and celebration. This was a sign of both comfort and true friendship as the only others who were invited were family. It was a very special evening for us. Her small family of husband, son, and a young girl who looks after her son live in a very tiny 2-room apartment. One small bedroom where everyone sleeps and a small kitchen area for cooking. She admitted earlier this week to being a bit shy about inviting us over, feeling as though her small apartment would be too small and uncomfortable for us. She had need not worried as we felt absolutely comfortable and at home in her place. But I also cannot help but feel somewhat shameful that my presence would cause her such worry – as if somehow I required more or expected something fancy – that what she could offer would not be good enough. It was more than good enough – it was real, true, and everyday life in Nepal – so much richer than anything we have experienced in our work or travels here. We absolutely loved being part of the fun and enjoyed much food, laughter, and playing with the kids. I will remember that night with such fondness and know that I have truly made a friend (and family) for life.
Irony. Dear man who caught the same tuk-tuk as me on Tuesday afternoon. I saw you lounging around outside the vehicle sucking in a final cigarette before we departed. You seemed to really enjoy the smoking – the hot smoke easily filling your lungs and slowly being exhaled in a bluish-white haze around your head. But I am a little confused. Was the face mask you donned following the cigarette meant to shield your lungs from air pollution?

Honouring Fridays: November 20th, 2009

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As I snuggled down into bed for a few more minutes of warmth and rest this morning I wished, for just a moment, that it wasn’t Friday. This particular Friday represented the end of calm and the beginning of a rather severe work storm. For the next seven days I will be attempting to support the organization I work with in the following ways: 1) hire a senior level Program Director, 2) hire a finance and administration officer, 3) co-host a workshop with the Association of International NGOs in Nepal and the Department of Education, and 4) plan and co-facilitate a 3-day strategic planning retreat. It all feels rather overwhelming placing me completely out of my depth. Somehow the work of 2 months seems to have been packed into the next week. And like anything difficult sometimes the best way is not around, but through. So, I will keep my eye on the sunny spot in the distance when the hard work is complete and we can celebrate our achievements. Until then, the head is down and the ploughing through has begun.

High school friends. There was a time when I thought that I would never lose touch with everyone I knew from high school. And then we all lost touch. Looking back it actually wasn’t that gradual – I escaped to my own adventures immediately following high school and was so absorbed in myself that I think I forgot my roots. It was not an intentional happening but due in part to geographical distance and in part to the need to find out who I really was. So, after many years, it has been so wonderful to see that some of those friends are slowly circling back, thanks in large part to facebook. This week one such friend was in Nepal and so he and his fiancée joined us for a lovely dinner. We had both changed but yet we were also absolutely the same. The conversation was spectacular and the company comfortable, familiar, and inspiring. Thanks to BK and L for a great time and for reminding me that those distant friends from high school are still friends, regardless of how far we may have drifted. Hope to see you again soon.
A busy week ahead. A busy week ahead means that work is happening which means that somehow our work has become important once again which means that someone cares which means that we can secure time and commitment from them which means we can achieve some of our goals which means that our donors will be happy which means that we may get more money which means that our work is slightly more sustainable which means that my work here is almost done.
Thinking like a duck. I have found a new inspiration for a more zen-like state of mind (and I will admit that zen is not my natural state of mind, so it does take me some rather intense work to achieve anything remotely close to zen-like mind). The inspiration is ducks, particularly duck plumage. I need to learn to be a better duck and waterproof my “feathers”. Let more things roll off my back without sticking. In the end, the stressors tend to be things I cannot control anyway – so why not “duck” them!
Goodbyes. This weekend some of our good friends and bananagrams partners, Anil and Julie, are departing Nepal and heading back to the UK. The poignancy of goodbyes here is influenced by the fact that often these may be people that you will never see again. But in this case, I am thrilled to say goodbye as they are returning to a wonderful life in the UK and will get to spend Christmas with their daughters and extended family. Plus, I know we will see them again in a few short months during our trip around the world. Safe travels friends and look forward to seeing you in May!

Taken for a ride

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So I have a story. In fact, this story took place almost a year ago, but I had almost forgotten about it until last weekend when it jumped back to mind. My story goes something like this.

Enter a blonde Canadian woman looking moderately overwhelmed but determined. She approaches a busy intersection to try and flag down one of the ubiquitous micro vans which will ferry her dutifully from here to there. One approaches and with an air of confidence she expertly flags it over, just like the other volunteers had taught her. The van stops.

Usually, a young boy pops out of the sliding back door shouting and urging anyone who looks interested into the back line of seats. But this time, no boy. After a few pulls on the securely locked back door, the driver and his one passenger wave her into the front of the cab which is a common occurrence at the beginning of a micro run – the plum seats are often those at the front (provided the sight of near-miss car crashes doesn’t give you a weak stomach) as it is easier to get out when your stop arrives. So, off the trio goes, merrily through the foggy and cool morning towards the drop point for our intrepid commuting blonde Canadian.

After a few minutes, our main character begins to look perplexed. Apparently the van isn’t making the usual stops along the way. In fact, the van isn’t making ANY stops. She voices her destination again, with a hint of panic and the two cab mates smile and nod. So, it would seem that our mistress of accident has in fact just hailed her own chariot (or abduction vehicle, depending on the end of this story). She glances around the van for any signs of ill-intent but sees nothing for any concern. Meanwhile her driver and friend have been eagerly speaking Nepali to her, testing her limited vocabulary and causing any nervous mistakes to quickly tumble from her mouth (not to mention the sweaty palms, frantic eyes searching for an escape, or the possible scenarios she imagines that may bring her untimely death…but yes…those little trifles…so much less interesting than sustaining a clear and coherent Nepali conversation).

As the van approaches her immediate destination it slows and then stops. She tumbles from the van, a sigh of relief escapes from her lips and she reaches for 10 rupees from her pocket, the fare originally intended for the micro, and looks bewilderingly at her escorts. They shake their heads, grin, and shout “Have a great day!”, taking pleasure from the fact that they were able to offer this foreigner a lift for part of her journey and have a great story for the rest of the day. And off they go, before she has a chance to return the thanks and give them an honest and genuine smile no longer hiding uncertainty.

No folks, this wasn’t a micro. Just your regular old work van with two guys off to work – I can’t imagine what they thought of this girl who just hopped into their van for the ride. Needless to say, their offer was kind-hearted and I still smile when thinking about it. Just one more thing to be grateful for…honest and good people.