Tag Archives: Feelings

Honouring Fridays: January 1st, 2010

Welcome to a New Year! Last night was my farewell party with my organization. I spent the evening surrounded by many of the people who have filled my working time in Nepal and felt so honoured and celebrated. The evening reminded me that so much of our work here is built on relationships. That the people I worked with expected the relationship to be built first, before much of the work could be started. They will be the first to acknowledge that I challenged them, sometimes more than was comfortable, but that the outcomes of our work were plentiful this past year. And I was the first to admit that I came with high expectations, short patience for inefficiencies, and perhaps an overly direct communication style (which at home is not direct at all but here translates into being quite direct and pushy!). The fact that so many people appeared for the celebration and so much care was taken to celebrate our achievements tells me that the relationships were successful. So, what looks on paper like an impressive list of achievements is actually much, much more significant – the capacities of people to interact and share in a genuine way and to build relationships – that is the real work and real outcome.

Our Chairperson, Mr. Baburam, thanking me. The white scarves, khata, were given by the many members in attendance to honour me and the marigold garland, malla, is also a form of honour. I was really touched and very happy :) — Our Chairperson, Mr. Baburam, thanking me. The white scarves, khata, were given by the many members in attendance to honour me and the marigold garland, malla, is also a form of honour. I was really touched and very happy 🙂

Opportunity. Like many of you, the 1st day of a New Year naturally brings some moments of pause and reflection. And what I fell most grateful for today is that the past year has given me so many new opportunities. Many of those opportunities were incredibly uncomfortable – bathing at a public tap while wrapped loosely in a long strip of fabric, trying to achieve some basic skill in a language that was so unfamiliar, and tackling work projects that were outside both my areas of expertise and my fields of interest. But what was common to all of them was that they were all uncomfortable learning opportunities. The greatest opportunity we can be given is the chance to step outside our comfort zones and this past year I have done that more than any other time in my life.
The Soloist. A beautiful and moving film. Reminds me of the idealism with which we approach human suffering, hoping to make change but perhaps becoming too focussed on a final “solution” or “outcome” while ignoring the wants and needs of the individual. In many ways this has been a struggle for me in Nepal as well – wanting so much to help people but needing to keep my own desires for their life in check so that they can fulfill their own dreams, not mine. This movie was a wonderful look into relationships, the role of “giver” and “receiver”. The real motivation to help people is often rooted in authenticity and genuine care but can quickly become overshadowed by a belief that the right solution is only possible through
Gifts of talent. I was so privileged to be the recipient of some lovely gifts last night. Beautiful wood carvings that will take some creative thinking to get home, a lovely letter of appreciation, and a red sari for special celebrations at home. But perhaps the most thoughtful of all was the gift from the didi who cleans our office. Now that the weather has turned cold I have been wearing a cap to work. We have been chatting about how cold it has been (about 5-10 degrees inside) so on my last day in the office she arrives with a cap she has knit for me! The colours are based on the scarf I wear every day and the style looks remarkably like the cap I have been wearing. Such a thoughtful gift and such a kind gesture. Truly a gift of talent that will both remind me of her generosity and keep me cozy and warm.

Sari — If Nepal has taught me one thing it is to not be afraid of wearing colours and patterns! My new sari and the knit cap from our didi. The sweater, while rather unflattering, was necessary because of the cold but I can assure you that the sari looks MUCH better without it.

The year ahead. There is so much anticipation about the year ahead, partiularly as our world will shift significantly in 2 weeks. We uproot ourselves once more and begin a 6 month set of travels. It is a thrilling prospect and I have such gratitude that so much will occur in the next year. I eagerly await the opportunity to connect with friends and family again in various parts of the world. It is time to begin anew and that fresh start is what I am most grateful for today.

Another shot of the cap up close as I sit outside and enjoy my salted ginger tea, a Newari specialty.

Honouring Fridays: December 18th, 2009

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It’s official. I am starting to feel nostalgic about leaving. I am seeing through rose coloured glasses again and remembering all the things that I love about living here. I know that I will come back again but it won’t be the same – I will be a visitor in a city that I once called home. And it is incredible how all the things that can be draining and frustrating about a place – the traffic madness, the inefficiency, the constant tea drinking – suddenly become endearing. I had a moment this week standing on the roof of our house looking out over the city and thinking how wonderful Nepal really is which I think means Nepal has officially gotten under my skin. So, while I am ready to move on, these last few weeks will be difficult. It will be a feast for the senses as I try desperately to remember the sights, smells, sounds, tastes, and feelings of this place. And, apparently, this week’s gratitude is brought to you by the letter “P” (unPlanned but precisely perfect pre-departure pondering).

Pomegranates. The season of really really good pomegranates has FINALLY arrived. They are bigger than a softball and full of hundreds of tartly sweet and juicy little seeds. Here they are available in regular red colour but also in the interesting yellow colour too! They both taste the same but the yellow ones are admittedly easier to eat as the juice doesn’t stain everything it lands on. I plan to enjoy a few pomegranates over the upcoming weeks. First, the seeds over yogurt that is full of dried fruit and nuts, topped with some toasted oats…like a granola but deconstructed. Second, in a couscous of some form. Yay for pomegranates!
Packing. On December 26th, we will carefully pack up our belongings and close the door on our cozy little apartment. Two weeks will be spent house-sitting for a friend and for the final week we will hunker down in the same guest house where we stayed when we first arrived 14 months ago. So, the house has been turned upside down as we sort through things and decide what to pack. I have always enjoyed packing – the trimming of “stuff”, the shrinking of possessions into discrete and neat boxes, the downsizing of life. This time, we are packing to fit into 2 bags, plus one carry-on bag, each. Basically, a life that we can carry on our backs (or send home with gracious friends and family from our first two stops in Hawaii and the Philippines). I look forward to the seeing a life that is bundled into a few bags – that sense of freedom that comes when one is no longer tied down by a home and furniture. That feeling will wear off, eventually, but for now, I am grateful for all the packing.
Poinsettias. Like the red saris worn during weddings by many Nepali women, to me the red poinsettia is a symbol of Nepal. They grow as large as trees here and adorn just about every house in Kathmandu. In most months of the year they are simply green shrubs but when the weather changes and the cold sinks into the Valley the poinsettias pop with colour. Below is a picture of a lovely bush I photographed at Godavari Village Resort during a workshop a couple weeks ago. Hard to believe that these tree-like plants are, back home, only table ornaments for a few weeks in December.

Principles. I know I have always had principles, in some form or another. But it has become clearer to me lately that my principles have become clearer since being in Nepal. There are some interesting conversations going around my office these days about money – how to save it and how to spend it. We have made a set of agreements with our donor on both of these issues. To my colleagues this is seen as a flexible agreement – something that can be bent, twisted, or perhaps even sneakily avoided. I disagree. Strongly. And with conviction. I understand the desire to try and save money for the future (particularly when the future is out of your control and in the hands of those donors). However, I don’t think it is wise (or even legal!) to try and squirrel away unspent funds by faking bills and twisting the truth. So, my principles, have me wading out into unfamiliar territory – not so much defending them as needing to convince others that they are valid. But I guess the gratitude comes when I realize that without my principles I would have little to keep me afloat in the argument. In the end they will do as they wish and I will still have my principles.

Honouring Fridays: December 11th, 2009

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I am the least patient person in the world…or at least in this room at the moment. I hate waiting and I catch myself, in moments where my patience has worn thin from waiting, trying to come up with good reasons why waiting is worth it. Because good things can come from waiting. Waiting for love…that is worth it. Waiting for vegetables to germinate and grow…also worth it. Waiting for bread to rise…definitely worth it. Waiting for a summer vacation…still worth it even though I am not 12 and summer vacation does NOT feel like it lasts forever. Waiting for the moment when you have enough money to buy a really wonderful piece of art…pretty sure that will be worth every penny when I get there. My point is that most waiting, while painful and irritating, is often really, really satisfying. So how can I tell if the wait is worth it? I just imagine the outcome. And if I were to arrive at the end of the waiting and find that the outcome is the opposite to what I was hoping for (i.e. no love, no vegetables, no bread, no vacation that lasts forever, and no fancy pants art hanging in my living room) and I know that I would feel sad, disappointed, and heart broken, then it is worth the wait. The investment of time…the waiting…can yield a darn good harvest sometimes…even if I do grumble about it along the way.

The return of orange season. If there is one thing I remember about when I arrived 13 months ago, it was the oranges. The piles upon piles and baskets upon baskets of fragrant oranges on every street corner. It was the first Nepali word I learned. Suntala. Similar to a mandarin oranges but full of seeds they provide a cheap and healthy snack at any time of day. Best eaten outside on a rooftop where seeds are easily spit over the edge. And, locally available which means Mandarin oranges for Christmas are not a once-a-year indulgence here. Instead they are a 4 month staple.
Hot water. The bright orange flame pops to life following a slow hiss as the gas is released. It sputters and flashes. The water dribbles out of the hand-held shower nozzle and into the blue bucket. A few degrees colder and it could be ice. Slowly, the orange flame works its magic on the frigid water, easing the chill. The digital numbers on the front of the gas heater climb slowly. 21. 22. 23. 26. When it reaches 30 I take the plunge. But there is no way it is actually 30. It is probably closer to 25…but warmer than melted ice. It takes about 5 minutes for the water to get hot – steamy hot. But then come the moments in between – when the water is off and the race to lather as quickly as possible is on. The steamy hot is all that separates you from goose bumps. It is an internal debate that I have with myself every time I shower – let the water trickle and keep me warm or turn it off and move fast, very fast. And saving water always wins – no matter how cold those 2 minutes might be – because it means there will still be water left in a couple of days which means the possibility for another blissfully hot shower.
Kathmandu at night. Now that the seasons have changed again, my evening bus rides home at about 5:00 every evening are in the dark. And lately I have found that there is something bewitching about the city in the dark. It retains it frenetic pace and chaotic snarl of traffic, people, and noise but it twinkles. The flashing red of the motocycle lights mixed with the dull sheen of candles in windows where the power is out. The darkness also hides some of the city’s flaws, concealing the gritty, dusty, and worn surroundings and replaces them with mysterious shapes, sleek and modern looking in the darkness. Hurtling across the city on a crowded bus watching Kathmandu slink and wink past my window is one of the best endings to a day.
The moment on weekends when you wake up at 6:00am and realize that you can simply close your eyes and go back to sleep…indefinitely. Roll over, snuggle down, and tumble back into a good dream, a moment of peace, or a deep slumber.

Honouring Fridays: November 27th, 2009

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The week is almost through and the relief and excitement about some serious relaxing and downtime is starting to creep into the mind. It was an 8 day work week with events, interviews, and meetings to fill the time. Somehow, the pace has reminded me of what work life must be like back home and I find I am more efficient and more satisfied with the increase in pace. Does this mean I am better suited to a faster work environment? Or have I not fully adjusted to the slower pace of life here? It might be a shock to arrive home and discover how quickly life will move but somehow I think it will suit me just fine 🙂

Peppermint. It might be the impending Christmas season that has driven this obsession with peppermint but I just can’t seem to get enough of the peppermint tingle. I have a peppermint chapstick, soap, lotion, and now drink a steaming cup of peppermint tea every night. I have dreams of brewing hot chocolate and then steeping a peppermint teabag in the sweet mixture – who needs a Starbucks’ peppermint mocha when you can have that instead!
Letting someone else take control. It is far too easy for me fall into the routine of trying to control and plan everything…I am an organizer…a list maker. I claim those titles proudly, usually, but every once in awhile (and forgive me those of you who are free spirits who would not think for a moment that any of this was truly giving up control…indulge me while I stretch my own boundaries and next time you attempt to make plans I will not scoff in your direction) I enjoy the thrill of letting someone else into my kitchen :). So, this week…I let R make dinner! We had buffalo-mushroom-tomato pasta and it was delicious! I relinquished control in the kitchen and now I am having visions of simply never going back in – that’s how tasty it was!
Being invited into “real life” in Nepal. My colleague Sujata’s son, Ayush, celebrated his 2nd birthday this week. And to my surprise she invited R and I over for dinner and celebration. This was a sign of both comfort and true friendship as the only others who were invited were family. It was a very special evening for us. Her small family of husband, son, and a young girl who looks after her son live in a very tiny 2-room apartment. One small bedroom where everyone sleeps and a small kitchen area for cooking. She admitted earlier this week to being a bit shy about inviting us over, feeling as though her small apartment would be too small and uncomfortable for us. She had need not worried as we felt absolutely comfortable and at home in her place. But I also cannot help but feel somewhat shameful that my presence would cause her such worry – as if somehow I required more or expected something fancy – that what she could offer would not be good enough. It was more than good enough – it was real, true, and everyday life in Nepal – so much richer than anything we have experienced in our work or travels here. We absolutely loved being part of the fun and enjoyed much food, laughter, and playing with the kids. I will remember that night with such fondness and know that I have truly made a friend (and family) for life.
Irony. Dear man who caught the same tuk-tuk as me on Tuesday afternoon. I saw you lounging around outside the vehicle sucking in a final cigarette before we departed. You seemed to really enjoy the smoking – the hot smoke easily filling your lungs and slowly being exhaled in a bluish-white haze around your head. But I am a little confused. Was the face mask you donned following the cigarette meant to shield your lungs from air pollution?

Honouring Fridays: November 13th, 2009

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Today is our 1-year anniversary of arriving in Nepal! I can easily recall the feelings of excitement, nervousness, and uncertainty that rumbled through me. I remember it being colder than I expected and that the sights, colours, smells, and sounds were overwhelming. I noticed the other day while riding a small tuk-tuk home from work that I was almost dozing during the ride – day-dreaming and not thinking about where to get off, what to watch out for, and what to do next. What a change from when I would have my nose pressed against the window to see every moment of the trip. I clearly have some comfort and ease with life in Kathmandu now – I live with more confidence.

And arriving today are 16 new volunteers – tonight we will welcome them with a party – and I can only hope that the same feelings I had one year ago will be slightly eased through conversations with those of us who have learned to live here with confidence.

For myself, I have learned that it takes courage, patience, persistence, flexibility, and a good sense of humour to enjoy life here – may I carry these abilities into the next year full of adventures!

The beginning of the fresh produce season! Like any food growing endeavour, there are certain seasons in which certain vegetables grow the best. As we move into the cool months, Fall if you will, we join many countries around the world that are engaged in harvesting. The vegetables coming into our local shops these days are incredibly delicious and almost cartoonish in their bold and vibrant colours. The cool weather has brought back the orange glow to the carrots, the deep purple sheen to the onions, the creamy whiteness of the cauliflower, and the ruffled and dewy leaves of bright green spinach and mustard. There is no question that the vegetables we are eating are the freshest we have seen in a long time. It is a wonderful time to cook in Nepal and to reap the flavours, colours, and tastes of a wonderful harvest…not to mention the beautiful bundles of golden yellow ripe rice stalks draped across in the paddies.
Functioning governments. Granted that there it is something of an oxymoron to place the words “functioning” and “governments” in the same sentence. But I sometimes think that the Canadian government is possibly the most efficient, well-oiled, and proactive bureaucracy around…in comparison that is. As Nepal struggles to overcome poverty, lack of infrastructure, impossible geographic terrain, drought, poor health care, human rights issues, and education development what holds them back nine times out of ten is a government that simply doesn’t function. And by “doesn’t function” I mean a government that actually doesn’t meet regularly and when they try to meet the whole process is derailed due to a agitating groups blocking the parliament from meeting. And not just for a day or two, but for months going on years! Not to mention the corruption, deceit, lies, targeted killings, and oppression perpetrated by many government officials. So, despite the petty and often ridiculous antics of politicians back home I am actually pretty grateful for how much our government does for us…regardless of who is in power.
Christmas carols. So, normally in my books November is WAYYYY too early to bust out the jingle bells and sing along to deck the halls. But, being away from my regular traditions and seasonal cheer I allow myself to break the rules. So, on a powerless night last week I did the unthinkable and turned on my Christmas playlist. And it was excellent! Something so simple that immediately feels familiar and happy. I think what makes Christmas carols so good is that they really do bring an atmosphere of cheer and suddenly I am remembering all that is so wonderful about this time of year. So, on your next “silent night”, bust out a carol and feel grateful for everything you love about Christmas.
Finding the right words. There is nothing more satisfying than being able to take a feeling that has stuck with you for a time and put that feeling into words. When the words can tumble from your mouth and sound like a perfect description for something previously indescribable, it is magic. I believe that these kinds of words are the sweetest to hear. They rumble and resonate with the heart and the brain, satisfying both the heart’s need for expression and the brain’s need for explanation.

Honouring Fridays: October 30th, 2009

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Happy Halloween! Nepal is not quite into the spooky, creepy crawly, bewitchiness that is Halloween. However, that won’t stop us. Tonight we are off to a Halloween party complete with pumpkin carving thanks to our dear Canadian friend Michelle. Costumes are hard to find so instead we opted for masks. Brilliantly feathered carnivale type masks were only 40 NPR at the local store (that is like 50 cents for anyone counting.) – we will look like owlets or birds I think. And this weekend there will be pumpkin…oh yes. I have my sights set of these delicious pumpkin donuts and perhaps a vat of pumpkin soup (of course kicked up a notch and flavoured with the cancer busting power of curry!).

Hearing the birds sing. I normally associate singing birds with the onset of Spring in Vancouver – that sprightly and excited bird chattering that pops up when the sun finally breaks through the clouds and rain for the first time. But I have noticed lately in Kathmandu that the mornings and evenings are full of birds singing. I think the rainy monsoon weather may have kept their songs hidden but the crystal clear and noiseless November days are perfect for a twitter of bird songs. Nothing better than waking up to a beautiful blue sky day with birds singing – holds the promise of good things.
These. I covet these. I only wish they had my size! I am holding my breath and hoping that they will shortly stock my size but even if they don’t I still think they are a spectacular fashion find. The ability to mix and match soles and tops, the recycled sari colours, and the multiple tying possibilities make them extra covet worthy. I am clearly experiencing the “Oh my god I am leaving Nepal soon and will need to dress like normal not-so-sloppy adult…quick someone get me some cute sandals!”
The perfect job. Okay, so I haven’t yet found THE perfect job, but I sure have had some great jobs that came pretty darn close. And this week, especially, I have realized how grateful I am for work that makes me feel good. Loving my work is important to my overall life satisfaction – I am not someone who can work to live – I live to work (and do something meaningful in the process). So, as I consider the fact that I will be unemploymed in about 2 months (vagabonding around the world) I don’t think it is too early to send a quick reminder to those who are gainfully employed…I AM LOOKING FOR THE PERFECT JOB…STARTING AUGUST 2010…IN VANCOUVER…HIRE ME 🙂 If you know of a great job or someone who might want to hire me, just leave me a comment below. It doesn’t have to be perfect…just close to perfect 🙂
Ayush. This week, my colleague Sujata brought her 2-year old, Ayush, to the office. The plan was for him to play outside in a grassy patch out front of our office, while his nanny watched and we orked. It sounded good, in theory but of course, Ayush had different plans! He is a curious, precocious and active little guy who charmed me easily from my desk out to the grass to play. I let Sujata work for a bit and we played catch with a ball for an hour or rather he kicked the ball and I chased it around the yard, much to his 2-year old delight. So, needless to say, little work was accomplished that day – if we weren’t in the yard playing, he was jumping around our office pulling at various cables and cords, knocking things over, and investigating my laptop with his sticky fingers. There is a reason why 2-year olds and work don’t usually mix! Fun for him, unproductive for us! But for one day, just one, I was reminded just how fun it is to be 2, even when you are 30.

Honouring Fridays: September 11th, 2009

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Well folks, this is the beginning of the end. The beginning of my vacation (well, almost) and the end of working like a maniac…for a whole 4 weeks! We look forward to greeting my parents at the airport on Tuesday night and embarking on a trip to Pokhara, a short mountain trek, a bunch of small day trips around Kathmandu, and then a 9 day trip around Rajasthan in India. And with this adventure comes the great need to disconnect from my life in Kathmandu…just enough to clear the mind and rejuvenate the spirit.

So, this will be my final Friday gratitude post for the next 4 weeks. I may post some photos of our trip or the odd note during this time but will return in earnest with my weekly musings on things I am grateful for on Friday, October 16th. Until then enjoy the beginning of Fall – bake an apple crisp, buy a new sweater, and crush some dry leaves underfoot.

XMind. On two instances over the past month I have needed to pull together a partnership map to show the connections between various stakeholders, community groups, partners, government, donors and volunteers. In non-development speak this is really just a complex organizational diagram that shows how any involved is connected to anyone else involved. After fiddling for some time with the PowerPoint org chart functions I quickly realized they were much too hierarchical for our holistic approach. So, off to the web to find something better (and free, and open source…of course!). Enter XMind, a great tool for mind-mapping of the complex and chaotic variety. Here is an example of what I was able to do.
Dhaka topi. I have been taking more notice lately of the tradition Nepali caps that men here wear. Topi ithe general word for hat and dhaka is the cloth used to make traditional Nepali mens wear. When used together they refer to the hat worn when wearing the dhaka clothes. They are jaunty, colourful, and rather charming. Somehow, they remind me of time passed – I imagine what Kathmandu might have looked like years ago, with bikes being the main mode of transport, when colourful dhaka topis topped the head of every man riding a bike…it must have looked something like this.
Sel roti. Sel roti looks like a large skinny donut. It is a sweetened rice flour bread that is deep fried and eaten with Nepali tea or with a snack of curried chick peas. I ate my first sel roti last week as they are a common snack around festival time. I have not yet had the guts to try and make them but if you want to give it a go, here is a good recipe. The slight crunch of the ground rice bits gives the texture of cornmeal and the sweet dough with the slight hint of banana flavour all drenched in a crispy greasy crust…delicious!
The right amount of time. Enough time to appreciate, notice, and enjoy what is around you. Not so much time that you feel stuck and stagnant. Enough time to soak it all in. Not so much time to feel you might never make it to the end. Enough time to feel powerfully connected. Not so much time that powerful connections turn into resentful relationships. Just the exact right amount of time when everything makes sense.

Rooted

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home. my place and space, where water coloured edges fray with memories.

invisible roots plunge deeply and firmly, anchoring souls, like a salmon remembering their stream

home. my memories tumbling in the waves. they are smoothed and rounded and soft. the jagged edges no longer burn with salt.

the tides ebb and flow even when I am landlocked. the moon tugs at the current and waves rush to fill a small gap in my heart.

home. where deep, salty waters preserve my roots.

Honouring Fridays: June 5th, 2009

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The weekend ahead is full relaxing – no plans and no plans to make any plans. When I started posting blogs on Fridays the idea was to recognize just how much potential and excitment was wrapped into a Friday – to honour that magical anticipation with some bold words of appreciation. I am amazed that after writing posts for every Friday since January, I am still full of things to be grateful for. And while I may have slipped for moments of whining, focussing on the positive things has certainly kept my spirits high and my perspectives in check…no problems, just inconveniences 🙂

Lychees. The season of fresh lychees is in full swing all over Nepal. The rough brown and pink exterior hides inside a rather gelatinous looking eyeball of sweet, juicy goodness. I, for one, don’t mind the texture but I could see how it may throw some people off. Eaten by the dozens they leave the fingers sticky with sugar and rough shards of husk everywhere! But they are beautiful to look at and sold by the 1 kg bunch from the neighbourhood fruit seller. I discovered that I had many unanswered questions about the lychee that wikipedia just didn’t have the answers to – enter LycheesOnline with the best set of FAQs I could find including “Can I plant the seeds from my lychee fruit to grow a lychee tree?” – everytime I eat a lychee is this the question I ask myelf. The answer – YES!
Change. The VSO Office in Nepal is undergoing some very drastic changes over the next few months. Staff are moving on to new opportunities, having babies, and shifting focus. Additionally, there is a large corporate strategic review happening right now as well. Everything is in flux. Nothing feels stable or firm. However, deep inside that change is opportunity. It is small, hard to see, and sometimes only evident after squinting for a really long time, but in the distance is the light at the end of the tunnel that brings fresh ideas, renewed energy andexceptional creativity. There is much to be grateful for but today I am grateful for possibilities.
Will Ferrell in Man Vs. Wild. So, Man vs. Wild is apparently, a really popular show on Discovery channel. I don’t watch it but I couldn’t resist downloading an episode that featured the Man (Bear Grylls) out in the Arctic of Sweden with Will Ferrell. It was fantastic! And it helped cool me down with the scenes of snow and ice in this humid hot house of an apartment.
Getting out of Kathmandu. Last weekend we took to the river and had an amazing time rafting through the green hills of Nepal. What I appreciated most about this experience was that it pulled the focus away from Kathmandu and reminded me just how incredible Nepal truly is. The geography is extreme, the beauty is intense, and the poverty is very real. But the poverty, while shocking to some, is simply life for many Nepalis. They eat what they can grow and live simply. So, while we make every effort to help Nepali people eliminate poverty, let us not also remove their ability to choose in the process. While we may see the benefits of refrigerators, cement houses, and products for every possible cleaning dilemma, they see the benefits of house made from local materials, eating daily and not relying on foods that need to stay cold, and having immune systems that cleaning products would actually weaken. Poverty is not equivalent to a desire to change or a need for a different life. It means the need for food, clean drinking water, and education – and then choice to determine the type of life they want.

The mental cycles of development work

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have hope

see bright future

doubt said bright future is possible

lose hope

lose belief in self

lose belief in other people

see shimmer of possibility

remember why this work is important

feel momentarily inspired

be crushed by the politics and self-interest of others

realize your assumptions were all wrong

have one great meaning or meaningful conversation

have hope…